Farrago

 So.. to bring y’all up to speed:

First off, a little arithmetic: No more beard = no weird looks + better service at cafes. My grandmother is elated. I forgot how much shaving sucks. God must have had a migraine when he invented the chin.

Last week we spent Rosh Hashana in the Galilee, at a Kibbutz called Kfar Blum. Our hotel, which cloistered itself within a tidy lattice of olive trees and tended lawns, was named “Pastoral”. It lay like a wet lizard at the foot of the Hula Valley, an agricultural Eden and mecca for migrating bird species on their way to Africa. All around it, the rolling ocre mountains of the Galilee, still charred from thousands of wildfires ignited by katusha rockets during the war last month, rise skyward as if hiding behind their backs the trenched and electrified borders with Syria and Lebanon. The place is quiet, apart from the trilling of countless babies, and comfortable. We spent the weekend lazing around, eating, napping, breakfasting, sleeping, dining, resting, dozing and snacking. We also hiked around the ancient ruins of Bannias, played with the kids, etc. The best bit was coming face-to-antler with a male red deer in full hormonal overdrive. Luckily, the two of us were separated by a chain-link fence. Still, the impact of his massive rack diffusing through the wire chain was more than impressive. Yeah… impressive rack.

In an exciting turn of events, I might be joining a wild dolphin survey on thursday. My aunt put me in touch with a researcher from IMMRAC (http://immrac.haifa.ac.il). When he called and offered to let me join the survey, I had to muffle the receiver so that he wouldn’t hear me wetting myself uncontrollably. Apparently, they ID these things individually from a rubber boat. I’ll believe it when I see it.

I’ll sign off with another dose of racially charged words of wisdom from my grandmother: “The chinese are very similar to the Jews. They value education, they have extremely close bonds with their familes, and they are very short. All around the world, when chinese settle in new areas, they always try to live next to the Jews, because they know that the Jewish kids are smart and study hard, and they want their kids to be like that, too.”

Me and the girls
The Lollypop Guild: Me & cousins Goni and Yael at Bannias

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~ by jonlib on September 26, 2006.

2 Responses to “Farrago”

  1. How exactly does a wet lizard lay?

    and why doesn’t safta realize that the chinese try to live by the jews so that the jewish kids can more easily patron their chinese restaurants?

    questions, questions, questions….
    -g.

  2. haifa ac il

    I Googled for something completely different..but found your page and have to say thanks. nice read.

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